I am blessed to be employed once again - no more sleeping in and lounging around (right - like that has ever been the case).
Within this last year, God has made it very clear that I am not to be comfortable.....but that true growth comes from being challenged. When I took my seasonal job at Operation Christmas Child it was a challenge - a challenge that I had to dress like an adult for work when I was so used to jeans and flip flops, to get paid WAY less than my previous job, to become very office savvy and challenged to submit - because for the first time in well over 4 yrs I was not in charge....and I loved every minute of it - and because I submitted to God's will for me, He used that season to show me true joy in serving Him.
Now I am in another place of total submission. I will be going back to my preschool roots. The idea of this job has been lingering for the past year. When I was first unemployeed and my staff had left the school - all 3 of them went here to work - and I couldn't have been happier. They were finally taken care of - paid what they deserved, got full benefits. I was overjoyed for them - yet when I thought of joining them, God said no. I see what a blessing that decision became, because I was able to experience a great adventure all of last year. I was also able to allow "my girls" the chance to break away from me as their "leader" and submit to their new administration. Fast forward to present day - I return from South Africa once again unemployeed and once again with the knowledge of this school and though what they offer is wonderful, it was a personal struggle to submit.
I know I am called to serve God's Children - it is a clear as day for me, but could that mean ALL God's children? I thought only the poor and broken. Here it is - I hate Orange County!!! I have come to understand that I have issues with my surrounding - though I am not wealthy in OC standards, after visiting some of the broken places I have, I know that I truly am - It just looks different than a fancy house and name brand purse. So the thought of serving "those" type of people seriously was a hard pill to swallow. I struggled with filling out the application....why God can't you just send me back to South Africa, why do you want me here? It is in those moments that I realized that God wanted to do a great work in me. He has taught me so much about compassion this past year - for those who lost it all, yet I had no compassion for those that seem to have everything. It was then I finally got it. How was I to love as Jesus did, yet I couldn't love my neighbors - literally? Was I really able to bloom where I've been planted??
So, here I am........ready to be stretched! I'm not in charge, I don't have my own classroom - and it's ok!!! God wants me here for reason, and slowly He's showing me that. Please pray for me that I keep that frame of mind when I don't agree with things, which certainly I won't. Pray that I put "me" aside and allow the Lord to show me, to use me - to be salt and light. Pray that in this time I am also continuing to serve my kids in South Africa, just because I am not there physically doesn't mean my work is done - far from. I have recently been able to experience the joy of those who support those who go. For so long I had been on the "going" end of things and last week I met a girl who is in that spot - and for once I was able to be on the giving end - and it was INCREDIBLE!!! Jealous at first - naturally, but I know God called me back here for a reason. I see that He has me at home that I may support those who are called to go.
Thank you -as always, for you love, support and prayers. I cannot express just how much it means to me to know I am surrounded by such love!!!
xoxoxo
B
Within this last year, God has made it very clear that I am not to be comfortable.....but that true growth comes from being challenged. When I took my seasonal job at Operation Christmas Child it was a challenge - a challenge that I had to dress like an adult for work when I was so used to jeans and flip flops, to get paid WAY less than my previous job, to become very office savvy and challenged to submit - because for the first time in well over 4 yrs I was not in charge....and I loved every minute of it - and because I submitted to God's will for me, He used that season to show me true joy in serving Him.
Now I am in another place of total submission. I will be going back to my preschool roots. The idea of this job has been lingering for the past year. When I was first unemployeed and my staff had left the school - all 3 of them went here to work - and I couldn't have been happier. They were finally taken care of - paid what they deserved, got full benefits. I was overjoyed for them - yet when I thought of joining them, God said no. I see what a blessing that decision became, because I was able to experience a great adventure all of last year. I was also able to allow "my girls" the chance to break away from me as their "leader" and submit to their new administration. Fast forward to present day - I return from South Africa once again unemployeed and once again with the knowledge of this school and though what they offer is wonderful, it was a personal struggle to submit.
I know I am called to serve God's Children - it is a clear as day for me, but could that mean ALL God's children? I thought only the poor and broken. Here it is - I hate Orange County!!! I have come to understand that I have issues with my surrounding - though I am not wealthy in OC standards, after visiting some of the broken places I have, I know that I truly am - It just looks different than a fancy house and name brand purse. So the thought of serving "those" type of people seriously was a hard pill to swallow. I struggled with filling out the application....why God can't you just send me back to South Africa, why do you want me here? It is in those moments that I realized that God wanted to do a great work in me. He has taught me so much about compassion this past year - for those who lost it all, yet I had no compassion for those that seem to have everything. It was then I finally got it. How was I to love as Jesus did, yet I couldn't love my neighbors - literally? Was I really able to bloom where I've been planted??
So, here I am........ready to be stretched! I'm not in charge, I don't have my own classroom - and it's ok!!! God wants me here for reason, and slowly He's showing me that. Please pray for me that I keep that frame of mind when I don't agree with things, which certainly I won't. Pray that I put "me" aside and allow the Lord to show me, to use me - to be salt and light. Pray that in this time I am also continuing to serve my kids in South Africa, just because I am not there physically doesn't mean my work is done - far from. I have recently been able to experience the joy of those who support those who go. For so long I had been on the "going" end of things and last week I met a girl who is in that spot - and for once I was able to be on the giving end - and it was INCREDIBLE!!! Jealous at first - naturally, but I know God called me back here for a reason. I see that He has me at home that I may support those who are called to go.
Thank you -as always, for you love, support and prayers. I cannot express just how much it means to me to know I am surrounded by such love!!!
xoxoxo
B
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